Dating & Relationship Glossary
Essential terms for understanding modern dating, online relationships, and digital infidelity
B
- Benching
- Keeping someone as a backup option while pursuing other romantic interests. The person on the bench receives just enough attention to stay interested but is never made a priority.
- Breadcrumbing
- Sending occasional flirty messages or giving just enough attention to keep someone interested without any intention of committing to a real relationship. This manipulative behavior strings the other person along with minimal effort.
- Burner Profile
- A secondary, often anonymous dating profile created to hide one's real identity. People in relationships sometimes create burner profiles to cheat without being easily discovered by their partner.
C
- Catfish Verification
- The process of confirming someone's real identity online. Methods include reverse image searches, video calls, and using AI facial recognition tools like CheaterFinder to match photos against dating app profiles.
- Catfishing
- Creating a fake online identity to deceive someone into a romantic relationship. Catfishers typically use stolen photos and fabricated personal details to manipulate their victims emotionally and sometimes financially.
- Cuffing Season
- The period during autumn and winter (roughly October through February) when single people seek short-term relationships to have a partner during the colder, holiday-heavy months. Dating app activity typically surges during this time.
- Cushioning
- Maintaining flirtatious connections with other people while in a committed relationship, as an emotional safety net in case the current relationship fails. Similar to benching but done from within a relationship.
D
- Digital Infidelity
- Engaging in romantic or sexual behavior online that violates the boundaries of a committed relationship. This includes maintaining active dating profiles, sexting others, or having emotional affairs through messaging apps.
- DTR (Define The Relationship)
- The pivotal conversation where two people discuss and agree on the nature and exclusivity of their relationship. The DTR talk clarifies whether the relationship is casual, exclusive, or something else entirely.
E
- Elo Score
- An internal ranking system used by some dating apps to rate user desirability. The score influences which profiles are shown to you and who sees your profile, based on factors like swipe patterns and engagement.
- Emotional Affair
- An intimate emotional connection with someone outside a committed relationship that, while not physically sexual, involves deep emotional bonding, secrecy, and the diversion of emotional energy from the primary partner.
F
- Facial Recognition Search
- Technology that uses AI algorithms to analyze facial features from a photo and search for matching profiles across dating platforms. Services like CheaterFinder use this technology to help users find profiles on Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and other apps.
G
- Gaslighting
- A form of psychological manipulation where the abuser makes the victim question their own reality, memory, or perception. In relationships, gaslighters deny events, twist facts, and blame the victim to maintain control.
- Ghosting
- Abruptly cutting off all communication with someone without any explanation. The person simply disappears from the relationship, ignoring all messages and calls, leaving the other person confused and hurt.
H
- Hard Launch
- Officially and publicly revealing a romantic relationship on social media by posting a clear photo of your partner, usually with an affectionate caption. The opposite of a soft launch, this is a clear statement that you are in a committed relationship.
K
- Kittenfishing
- A milder form of catfishing where someone uses heavily filtered or outdated photos, exaggerates accomplishments, or misrepresents details like height or age on their dating profile. Unlike catfishing, the person is real but presents an embellished version of themselves.
L
- Love Bombing
- Overwhelming someone with excessive affection, attention, gifts, and praise early in a relationship. While it may seem romantic, love bombing is often a manipulation tactic used by narcissists to gain control over their partner.
M
- Matching Algorithm
- Software logic used by dating apps to suggest compatible partners based on preferences, location, behavior, and other data. Each platform uses proprietary algorithms that weigh different factors to rank potential matches.
- Micro-Cheating
- Small, seemingly innocuous behaviors that blur the boundaries of fidelity, such as secretly messaging an ex, maintaining an active dating profile while in a relationship, or having an emotionally intimate connection with someone outside the relationship.
O
- Orbiting
- When someone stops direct communication but continues to engage with your social media by liking posts, watching stories, or commenting. They stay in your orbit without actually communicating.
P
- Paperclipping
- When an ex or old flame periodically pops back into your life with unsolicited messages just to confirm you still think about them. Named after the annoying Clippy assistant from Microsoft Office that appeared uninvited.
- Phubbing
- Ignoring someone in a social setting by focusing on your phone instead. Derived from "phone" and "snubbing," this behavior is increasingly common and can damage relationship satisfaction and trust.
- Profile Verification
- A process used by dating apps to confirm a user's identity, typically through selfie comparison, government ID, or video. Verified profiles display a badge, reducing the risk of catfishing and fake accounts.
R
- Red Flag
- A warning sign that indicates problematic or potentially harmful behavior in a partner or potential partner. Common red flags in dating include inconsistent stories, avoiding video calls, refusing to share social media, and being secretive about their phone.
- Reverse Image Search
- A technique for finding the original source of an image online. By uploading a photo to services like Google Images, you can discover where else that image appears, helping identify fake profiles and catfishers.
- Rizz
- Slang for charisma or the ability to attract a romantic partner through charm, style, and confidence. Having "rizz" means being naturally good at flirting and making a positive impression on dating apps and in person.
- Roaching
- Secretly dating multiple people while letting each person believe they are in an exclusive relationship. Named after cockroaches because where there is one, there are usually many more hiding.
S
- Situationship
- A romantic connection that falls somewhere between a friendship and a committed relationship. Situationships lack clear labels or defined expectations, creating ambiguity about the nature and future of the relationship.
- Slow Fade
- Gradually reducing communication and effort in a relationship rather than ending it directly. Unlike ghosting, which is sudden, the slow fade involves progressively taking longer to reply, canceling plans, and becoming increasingly unavailable.
- Soft Launch
- Subtly hinting at a new relationship on social media without revealing the partner's full identity. This usually involves posting a cropped photo showing a hand, silhouette, or partial view, testing the waters before making the relationship fully public.
- Stashing
- When your partner keeps the relationship hidden from their friends, family, and social media. Being "stashed" can indicate that the person is not serious about the relationship or may be seeing other people.
- Super Like / Super Swipe
- A premium feature on dating apps that lets you signal heightened interest in someone. On Tinder it's called a Super Like; on Bumble, a SuperSwipe. The recipient sees that you went beyond a regular swipe.
- Swipe Surge
- A Tinder feature that notifies users when there is an unusually high level of app activity in their area. During a Swipe Surge, users can get up to 15x more profile views, making it an optimal time to be active on the app.
- Swiping
- The core interaction on many dating apps where users swipe right to express interest or left to pass on a profile. This gesture-based matching has become the standard way to browse potential partners on platforms like Tinder and Bumble.
T
- Tindstagramming
- Finding someone on Instagram who didn't match with you on Tinder and contacting them directly. This behavior bypasses the mutual consent system of dating apps and is generally considered intrusive.
W
- Wokefishing
- When someone pretends to hold progressive political or social views on their dating profile to attract partners, only to reveal their true views once the relationship has developed. A form of deception targeting value-aligned matching.
Z
- Zombieing
- When someone who previously ghosted you suddenly reappears in your life as if nothing happened, often by liking social media posts or sending a casual message months or years later.